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Sean Maloney column: The Hollywood script Wallabies must follow in order to stun All Blacks

24 August 2017 9:10 PM
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Sean Maloney column: The Hollywood script Wallabies must follow in order to stun All Blacks

So, with that in mind, I’ve dug out four unbelievable underdog efforts from the movies to give us Aussie fans a hint of hope.

NEW PODCAST! Sean Maloney, Stephen Hoiles and Christy Doran cross to Sam Worthington in New Zealand to review Bledisloe 1, preview the 2nd Test in Dunedin and reveal their greatest upset sporting movies given the Wallabies’ underdog status.

Daniel La Russo (Ralph Macchio) is a Karate rookie, bullied merciless by the kids from the Cobra Kai dojo. Dan really bottoms out when the Cobra boys give him a proper shoeing at the school prom, it’s tough to watch.

Taking the Prom fancy-dress theme on a bizarre slant, Daniel San, dressed as a shower curtain, is pounded by the Kai until a bloke named Mr Miyagi (Pat Norita) saves the day with a couple of snap kicks.

Miyagi goes on to train La Russo, culminating in a final showdown at the local YMCA against the Cobra Kai’s Number 1 attack dog, Johnny.

With the ‘All Valley Karate Championship’ on the line and the Kai screaming ‘get him a body bag,’ Dan stands and delivers the one-legged crane kick for the win. It’s a beautiful moment.

A young Elizabeth Shue comes off the bench to celebrate with her boyfriend, who is now considering life without an ACL, PCL or MCL after Johnny swept his leg earlier in the fight.

Nathan Grey has a similar hairline to Mr Miyagi, I’m hoping he’s got the guys raring to get up off the canvas time and time again this Saturday.

When Darryl Kerrigan, who lives on the outskirts of Melbourne Airport is told his home is to undergo a compulsory acquisition, he digs his Ugg Boots in and tells the corporation to beat it.

Off to court they go, where Darryl has underdog lawyer Dennis Denuto represent him and the rest of Highview Crescent. Dennis always seems to have problems with his photocopier, in particular, whatever the F3 inside it is.

Anyway, the boys take a couple of hits early, but get great impact from the bench in the form of a QC named Lawrence. Lawrie lifts the team to an unimaginable victory, Dennis buys a new photocopier, Dale keeps his home and then takes Lawrie fishing at Bonnie Doon.

Nick Phipps loves this movie and is also coming off the pine, here’s hoping he can ‘pull a Lawrie’.

Forrest has a couple of learning difficulties and teething problems with his pins early on, but overcomes them to do, among other things.

Forrest and Sean McMahon have very similar haircuts and running styles. Here’s to Macca pulling a Forrest in Dunedin and just charging all day long.

In order to save Average Joe’s Gym from certain closure, its rag tag customers, led by owner Peter La Fleur (Vince Vaughn) and coached by Dodgeball legend Patches O’Houlihan (Rip Torn) contest the Las Vegas Invitational for a shot at the prizemoney and survival.

Patches preps the rookie team by throwing insults and wrenches at his squad, a true lateral thinker and hardman of the sport. The results are outstanding.

After some near misses in the early knock out rounds, Average Joes square off against the highly fancied Globo Gym Purple Cobras for the trophy.

Following a pep talk from Lance Armstrong of all people, La Fleur takes on arch nemesis White Goodman (Ben Stiller) in a shootout and the Joes prevail. Sadly, Patches isn’t there to celebrate on account of being crushed by a giant LED screen earlier in the flick.

The Bookies had the Joes at 50/1, this weekend, they’ve got the Aussies at 13/1.

Any one of the Wallabies has the chance to do like La Fleur and lift their side to glory this weekend, Bledisloe 2 — The Ultimate Underdog Story.

LIVE stream the Bledisloe Cup and Rugby Championship on FOX SPORTS. Get your free 2-week Foxtel Now trial and start watching in minutes. SIGN UP NOW >


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